My friend Brian recently ran into someone he hadn’t seen in years. Even though this person had never bothered to show up to his wedding, send a gift or an RSVP, Brian went out for beers with this guy. I meanwhile, was busy preparing voodoo dolls ……
I once saw 2 guys get into a physical fight and the next week they were back being friends. Like that would NEVER in a million years happen with women.
Ever notice that men just let things go, and women can hold on to resentment forever? Damn girl, we need to let that stuff go.
Holding grudges is toxic. When negative situations arise, there’s always a lesson to be learned. Figure out that lesson, and move on.
NEVER let resentment fester. It will only grow worse. (Why do women hate confrontation so much?? It isn’t some physical battle….it’s just a conversation. You’re confronting the issue, not the person). Always deal with the issue right away.
Stop complaining about other women or family members (I know! easier said than done Maja!), but seriously we all have a choice. We can accept the situation or person for what they are or did, or change how WE react to them. But replaying the past on an endless loop in your mind is a no-win situation. It’s an endless cycle of drama-hurt-ego-more drama and STRESS.
Stop expecting perfection from yourself & others. (enough said right?)
Stop over-thinking the situation. Just because someone didn’t respond to your text right away doesn’t mean they hate you. Just because someone didn’t call you back or their email seemed harsh doesn’t mean they think you’re an idiot. Stop the obsessive compulsive negative thoughts, it’s just noise in your mind that will distort your thinking.
Wishing people and situations were different is useless. The past is already gone, so just focus on the now, the present and let your resentments go.
Every single one of us knows another woman (maybe even ourselves) whose holding on to some resentment, some internal crap or bizarre disagreement we had with another woman.
Damn girl, if we’re going to run the world we have to start thinking and behaving like LEADERS, not scrappers, not complainers, not petty little nitpickers.
Leadership in all areas of our lives is the goal here, not perfection, not people-pleasing, and certainly not living in the past by holding on to resentment and animosity. Hang out with like-minded women, support this coalition of strong women and let go of the rest.