Stop Apologizing (sorry if that sounded rude)

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Stop apologizing. Seriously. Women need to stop apologizing for everything all the time.

I see this happen in conferences, seminars, workshops, graduate school, with my undergraduate students, at work, in meetings, the grocery store, my daughter’s daycare, –everywhere I go a woman is apologizing for something. I can’t remember the last time I heard a man apologize.

Where there’s a woman, there’s an apology coming up shortly. This is the truth. And it makes us sound like idiots. Who wants to take direction from someone who is constantly apologizing?

Leaders lead, successful people take ownership, and women apologize. We must change this.

I say this to enrage you so that we stop apologizing and I encourage all women to interrupt this apology tour we’re on.

Why do we constantly apologize?

Fear of not being liked. Fear of being seen as bossy, as over-reaching in our desires or ambitions. Fear of sounding stupid, so we preempt what we think people are thinking about us with an apology, as if to say “I already know what you’re thinking, ….and I’m sorry”.. It’s crazy talk. We also desperately fear offending people.

Don’t apologize for: Wanting something; Being ambitious, talented, and intelligent, thinking outside the box; changing things up; having opinions; or wanting to succeed.

Don’t apologize for wanting a different life from your parents/siblings/family members/friends/colleagues.

Don’t apologize for not following the status quo. Don’t apologize for following your passion.

The only thing you should ever be apologizing for is not working hard enough on fulfilling your passion, and the only person you should be apologizing to for that is yourself.

The 1st thing out of your mouth should not be an apology, it should be a sound bite about how awesome you are, or how fantastic your ideas/product or service is.

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Watch my favorite comediane, Amy Schumer in her brilliant sketch “I’m sorry”

‘Inside Amy Schumer’: I’m Sorry”

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