Success does NOT happen to you


Success will not tap you on the shoulder because success does not happen to you. You create success, every damn grueling day. 

Use your fear and anxiety and doubts to motivate you. Fear is good. I respect fear. Fear will ring louder than the naysayers in my mind. Fear will force me up at 5 a.m. because I am fearful of the mediocre life.  Read More

Black women lean in….and still don’t get noticed.

The consulting firm McKinsey and Company and  (Sheryl Sandberg’s nonprofit leadership organization) released their latest research on women in leadership positions.

Here are the key findings from Women in the workplace:

Women are negotiating as often as men—but face pushback when they do

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Difference in magazine covers

What are your thoughts on these 2 magazine covers?




So, if you’re a GIRL I guess your goals are to:

  • wake up pretty! (because mornings are rough!)
  • have your first kiss!
  • get your denim checklist
  • get your “dream hair”
  • have fun and make friends

If you’re a BOY, it seems that your goals are:

  • EXPLORE your friggin’ future!
  • Do you want to be an astronaut?
  • Do you want to be a chef? Or firefighter?
  • Figure out what you want in life.

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Focus on your brain, not your skinny jeans!

How smart is this girl??  I love it!  Watch this 5 minute clip from the Stephen Colbert show.

Her name is Olivia Hallisey and she’s the winner of Google’s Science Fair. She’s 17 years old! So confident, so articulate and clearly passionate about what she does. And she invented a new test for Ebola!

These are the types of role models young girls & women need to be surrounded by. Science is cool. Being smart is cool. And wanting to talk about things other than your body weight, or cooking or calories… SO much cooler.

Jealous much?



Ever find yourself jealous at someone else’s success?  Jealousy and envy aren’t necessarily evil emotions. They’re actually quite useful for confirming what’s missing in your life.

Usually you’re jealous or envious because you want something someone else has. You’re never jealous of what you don’t want, right?[i] Read More

If they don’t see it, they can’t be it.

Did you know that:

  • 28% of speaking characters in family films are female
  • 39%  of speaking roles in prime-time programming are female
  • 31% of CHILDREN’s show characters are women

What?? Wait a minute. This is crazy. We’re half the population, and barely 30% of what you see or hear on screen?

Remember the actress Geena Davis from the movie Thelma and Louise? Thelma and Louise.jpgWell, she started a research institute, called “The Geena Davis Institute on Gender in Media” in 2004 (why did I just discover this recently??). Read More

Mindy Kaling on confidence & hard work

Mindy Kaling Quote

So, I just finished reading Mindy Kaling’s newest book “Why Not Me?” and the best part was really the last chapter where she discusses confidence and work ethic.

Basically, she argues that confidence is just entitlement, and you’re not entitled to anything in this life unless you work hard for it and produce results. You better deserve your confidence. Read More

The Definition of Boring


Steven Pressfield wrote another book…..another book that changed my life. It’s called “Turning Pro: Tap Your Inner Power and Create Your Life’s Work”

It’s brutal in its honesty.

It’s stunningly simple in its clarity.

You have 2 choices in life:  You either repeat, endlessly repeat your boring life and your boring mundane activities, with your boring breakfast and boring friends, WITHOUT making any progress, WITHOUT any movement forward

OR Read More

Damn Princess

So, this is a picture of my daughter’s playroom.  You’ll notice that the kitchen takes prominence……

 and then I bought her this.

Seriously. I complain about the absurdity of wasting your time cleaning and then I buy my 3-year-old a cute little cleaning kit. And so she sweeps the floors, wanting to “clean like Mama”……

What am I doing? Read More

Say “YES” to everything.

Saying yes

If you’re just starting out your career, changing careers or starting your own business you need to say “YES” to every single opportunity and experience. Say “YES” immediately and figure it out later.

You need to look at every encounter or experience as an opportunity to sell, self-promote and get noticed.

Saying “YES” to opportunities is different from being a people-pleaser, a doormat or victim. I’m not saying to get used by others or to constantly do your work for free. No. This is different. Read More

What are your goals?

goals 3

Forget about setting realistic or reasonable goals. Save that for those that want mediocrity. What you need is completely insane goals to push you right out of your comfort zone.

If you’re going to push past procrastination or resistance, you’ll need some extraordinary payoff to get you there. If you’re going to maintain the energy, stamina and determination to get to the top, the rewards better be phenomenal. So, reach UP. Demand more of yourself.   Read More

Why you need to SELL yourself and Self-Promote.

Selling 2

Selling is the art of persuasion, you’re inducing someone to buy something from you. To buy into your ideas, your product, your service, your brand and you. What’s wrong with that?  NOTHING. BUT damn, most women HATE selling. Just the idea of “selling” makes them feel uncomfortable.

Everywhere you go, you’re selling. And if you think you’re not selling, then someone is selling to you. (You’re being sold! and you don’t even realize it). Read More

Winning Miss Congeniality will get you NOWHERE.

Entrepreneur 6

Why are SO many women obsessed with being “nice”?  Why are we acting grateful when we should be acting confident?  Because we’re PEOPLE PLEASERS!!!

Why are we so timid, passive and fearful of interrupting or offending, when we should be putting ourselves and our ideas out there for everyone to hear?

Listen Ladies, winning Miss. Congeniality will get you NOWHERE. Oh wait; actually it will make you a people pleaser, a door mat, average, ordinary, mediocre, and completely forgettable.

Is that what you want?

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